Dennis Miller skewered Nancy Pelosi and the ant-war protesters on the Tonight Show last night. I can't remember it verbatim and tell it like he does, but here's a transcript from 11/8/2002 to enjoy.
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Jay Leno: “I’m fascinated to hear your take on the election. Because you always have a little different look at things than most Hollywood people.”
Dennis Miller: “I want to congratulate my President. I think he had a great day. I think George Bush is a good man.”
[applause]
Leno: “Yeah? He did a fine job.”
Miller: “I think, I think he’s a good man and I think he’s done a fine job in these last two years. I don’t think he’s a great man but I would prefer that our President would be a good man because great men tend to believe they're great men and then they end up not being great men any more. I like Bush because he seems like a regular decent guy. And you know what? He’s a big picture guy. Which just shocks me. Because when he first came into the office I think many of us thought that he was the sort of guy who watched television one pixel at a time. But uh, shockingly he’s proven himself to be a big picture guy. I like his sense of humor. At least I hope it’s his sense of humor. I uh, sometimes think it’s Norm Crosby’s sense of humor. But uh, I think the thing I like most about him is that he’s not Clinton. I just think he’s a decent guy. I mean, you know...”
[applause]
Miller: “I’m telling ya when I watch those, the videotape of the retarded kids playing uh, tee-ball on the White House lawn, on the field that he built for them.
Leno: “Yeah.”
Miller: “And I juxtapose it with Clinton and the wocka-wocka porno guitar of the Clinton administration. I just like Bush, he makes me proud to be an American again. He’s just a decent guy.”
Leno: “He is a decent guy. But do you-”
Miller: “And you know what, what? Jay what, what are the Democrats really offering? You know I consider both sides in an election before I vote. I looked at what the Democrats are saying. They’re saying, 'Listen we want more of your money and we’re not really keen on preemptively protecting you from bad guys.' You know what folks? I don’t want the bad guys to have the next move. I don’t want to see two more big buildings blown up.”
Miller soon explained: “Listen, I began to go off liberal America when they insisted to me that Rudy Giuliani was a bad guy. You remember that years ago? How they told us Rudy Giuliani, they always like tinged on the Nazi reference.”
Leno: “Right, right, yeah right.”
Miller: “'He’s a storm-trooper! He’s a bad guy!’ Every time I’d go to New York it was cleaner and safer and I’d think, 'Wait a second how bad a guy can this guy be?’ And now you don’t hearing anybody saying that because it’s been proven out that Rudy Giuliani is a good man....” |
