Subject: True Story / Lawyers.... Why lawyers should never ask a witness a question if they aren't prepared for the answer....
In a trial, a southern small town prosecuting
attorney called his first witness to the stand, a grandmotherly, elderly woman. He approached her and asked, "Mrs. Jones, do you know me?"
She responded, "Why, yes I do know you, Mr.
Williams. I've know you since you were a young boy, and frankly, you've been a big disappointment to me. You lie, you cheat on your wife, you manipulate people and talk about them behind their backs. You think you're a big shot when you haven't the brains to realize you never will amount to anything more than a two-bit paper pusher. Yes, I know you."
The lawyer was stunned. Not knowing what else to
do, he pointed across the room and asked, "Mrs. Jones, do you know the defence attorney?"
She again replied, "Why yes, I do. I've know Mr.
Bradley since he was a youngster, too. He's lazy, bigoted, and he has a drinking problem. He can't build a normal relationship with anyone and his law practice is one of the worst in the entire state. Not to mention, he cheated on his wife with three different women. Yes, I know him." the defence attorney almost died!
At this point, the judge brought the courtroom to
silence, called both attorneys to the bench, and in a very quiet voice said, "If either one of you bastards asks her if she knows me, you'll be jailed for contempt!" |
