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Politics : Sharks in the Septic Tank

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To: epicure who wrote (74683)	9/13/2003 11:30:01 AM
From: Lane3	Read Replies (1) of 82486

'Girl Wars': an excerpt SCRIPPS HOWARD NEWS SERVICE "Girl Wars: 12 Strategies That Will End Female Bullying" by Cheryl Dellasega and Charisse Nixon (Fireside, $13) "Too often, the words 'assertive' and 'aggressive' are used interchangeably, without a clear understanding of the difference between these two ways of communicating. Assertive means expressing your opinions, feelings, attitudes, and rights in a manner that doesn't take advantage of other people or hurt their feelings. "Aggressive means getting your needs met at the expense of others; bullies communicate in aggressive, hurtful ways. Passive behavior is failing to speak up when you want to because of lack of courage or ability. "The basic format for assertive communication involves three steps. First, validate the other person by recognizing how she's feeling or what she's done. Second, state your feelings about the behavior. Third, make a request for change or tell the other person what you would like." * Parenting Bookshelf is an occasional feature that excerpts advice from a new how-to book.

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