Iran Out of Axis of Evil
North Korea’s Kim expels the country, saying it’s ‘no longer evil enough’
NEWSWEEK WEB EXCLUSIVE
Oct. 28 — One week after Iran agreed to put a halt to its nuclear program in response to pressure from the international community, North Korea expelled Iran from the Axis of Evil, saying that Iran was “no longer evil enough.”
THE DECISION TO oust Iran was made unilaterally by North Korean dictator Kim Jung-Il, who aides said was “hopping mad” at Iran’s decision to abide by the anti-nuke mandate.
“You call yourself evildoers?” a furious Kim reportedly bellowed into the phone when he received a call from Iran’s foreign minister, notifying him of Iran’s decision to comply. “My sharpei is eviller than you!”
The expulsion of Iran is just the latest blow to the Axis of Evil, long considered the most elite club of evildoers in the world.
The A.O.E. already lost one of its founding members, Iraq, with the fall of Iraqi madman Saddam Hussein in April, making the departure of Iran potentially devastating to the evil consortium.
As a result, Mr. Kim has shifted into recruitment mode, looking for what he called an “evillerdoer” or two who could join the Axis of Evil and bring it back up to full strength.
On Mr. Kim’s short list, aides say, are the nation of Syria and the singer/actress Liza Minnelli.
Elsewhere, in a Pentagon memo released today, secretary of Defense Donald H. Rumsfeld writes that the Pentagon is not doing enough to win the war against Condoleezza Rice. |
