BY JAMES TARANTO
Friday, January 23, 2004 3:26 p.m. EST
Sideshow Overshadows Circus
That was a pretty boring debate last night, at least if you're interested in who's actually going to be the Democratic nominee. We tuned in hoping to see how well John Kerry would hold up under attack from his opponents now that he's the front-runner, but the other guys didn't lay a finger on him.
The Dems seem to have learned the lessons of Iowa too well--too well, at least, for those of us who were hoping for fireworks. No one wants to follow the path of Dick Gephardt, who did mortally (we're guessing) wound Howard Dean, but destroyed himself in the process. Dean himself was subdued, trying his best not to scare potential voters. But while Dean may be too hot for most voters' tastes, a mellow Dean is like a mild jalapeño pepper--a thing whose very existence is utterly pointless.
The winner of this debate was co-moderator Peter Jennings, who asked a pair of devastating questions--one of Al Sharpton, one of Wesley Clark--that underscored what a freak show the whole exercise was. He asked Al Sharpton whom he would name as chairman of the Federal Reserve Board, then, with wicked irony, added: "And maybe just take a minute or so to give us a little bit about your views on monetary policy." Al Sharpton!
Sharpton made a quip about Howard Dean's "hooting and hollering," then offered some criticism of the International Monetary Fund. To which Jennings replied: "Forgive me, Reverend Sharpton, but the question was actually about the Federal Reserve Board." Sharpton's answer (the transcript omits his numerous "uhs"):
Oh, in the Federal Reserve Board, I would be looking for someone that would set standards in this country, in terms of our banking, our--in how government regulates the Federal Reserve as we see it under Greenspan, that we would not be protecting the big businesses; we would not be protecting banking interests in a way that would not, in my judgment, lead toward mass employment, mass development and mass production. I think that--would I replace Greenspan, probably. Do I have a name? No.
Then there was this exchange with Clark:
Jennings: General Clark, a lot of people say they don't know you well, so this is really a simple question about knowing a man by his friends. The other day you had a rally here, and one of the men who stood up to endorse you is the controversial filmmaker Michael Moore. You said you were delighted with him.
At one point, Mr. Moore said, in front of you, that President Bush--he's saying he'd like to see you, the general, and President Bush, who he called a "deserter." Now, that's a reckless charge not supported by the facts. And I was curious to know why you didn't contradict him, and whether or not you think it would've been a better example of ethical behavior to have done so.
Clark: Well, I think Michael Moore has the right to say whatever he feels about this. I don't know whether this is supported by the facts or not. I've never looked at it. I've seen this charge bandied about a lot. But to me it wasn't material. This election is going to be about the future, Peter. And what we have to do is pull this country together. And I am delighted to have the support of a man like Michael Moore. . . .
Jennings: Let me ask you something you mentioned, then, because since this question and answer in which you and Mr. Moore was involved in, you've had a chance to look at the facts. Do you still feel comfortable with the fact that someone should be standing up in your presence and calling the president of the United States a deserter?
Clark: To be honest with you, I did not look at the facts, Peter. You know, that's Michael Moore's opinion. He's entitled to say that. I've seen--he's not the only person who's said that. I've not followed up on those facts.
And God bless Dennis Kucinich, who didn't even need Jennings's help to be every bit as clownish as Sharpton or Clark. Asked how he plans to eliminate the budget deficit, he enumerated a laundry list of new spending programs:
I intend to create a universal, single-payer, not-for-profit health care system. . . . I intend to create a universal pre-kindergarten program, not for profit, that would be run by the public schools. . . . I intend to create universal college education. . . . The one thing I won't do is cut domestic programs.
Kucinich also promised: "In the same way that President John F. Kennedy decided to bring the academic and spiritual resource of this country to have the United States reach the moon someday, I intend to have a very infinitely interesting journey to planet Earth." Wake us up if he ever arrives.
Stop the Presses
"Democrats Criticize Bush in N.H. Debate"--headline, Associated Press, Jan. 22
Kerry Fever Grips Granite State Dems
Is there any stopping John Kerry? Reuters reports the latest Zogby tracking poll gives him a comfortable lead in New Hampshire, with 30% against 22% for second-place Howard Dean and 14% for Wesley Clark. The latest American Research Group results: Kerry 31%, Clark 20%, Dean 18%.
On CNN's "Crossfire" yesterday, Kerry's fellow Massachusetts Democrat Rep. Edward Markey attributed the senator's rise to the stunning new revelation that he served in Vietnam:
John Kerry has to get out this message honestly that he was a winner of the Silver Star and the Bronze Star in Vietnam. This is not--was not well known before the Iowa caucus.
Of course, it could hurt Kerry if word gets out that he's haughty and French-looking.
With the other candidates reluctant to "go negative" on Kerry, that task is left to The New Republic. TNR's Michael Grunwald anticipates the GOP line of attack should Kerry win the nomination:
In all likelihood, they would hammer Kerry for his opposition to mandatory minimum sentences for dealers who sell drugs to children and for voting against the death penalty for terrorists. They would mock his efforts to provide cash benefits to drug addicts and alcoholics, and his onetime opposition to a modest work requirement for welfare recipients. They would trash him for supporting more than half a trillion dollars in tax increases-including hikes in gas taxes and Social Security taxes on ordinary Americans-while accepting free housing and other goodies for himself from friendly influence-peddlers. They would even point out that, when Kerry served as lieutenant governor under one Michael S. Dukakis, Massachusetts famously furloughed more than 500 murderers and sex offenders under a program Kerry later defended as tough.
On the other hand, Grunwald notes, "John Kerry fought honorably in Vietnam." Funny, that's the first we've heard of it.
You Don't Say--I
"Dean's Late-Night Battle Cry May Have Damaged Campaign"--headline, Los Angeles Times, Jan. 22
Public Rejects Polls, Polls Show
"The former Vermont governor said he's 'not blow-dried . . . not coached,' and added, 'I don't look at polls and even if I did, they didn't do me any good in Iowa.' "--Associated Press, Jan. 22
"At the same time, an aide said, Dr. Dean will stop talking about the process of his campaign--in other words, his success at using the Internet to recruit supporters--and more about the issues that polls said New Hampshire voters were interested in."--New York Times, Jan. 22
Vermonster Mash
Fun with Howard and Hillary: Download "Yeagh," James Lileks's musical rendition of Howard Dean's Monday night outburst, then go to the Dancing Hillary page while playing it on your MP3 player, and watch New York's junior senator cut a rug. This page indexes a few dozen more Dean remixes.
Another Loser for Clark
The New York Times reports that Wesley Clark has "been endorsed by David N. Dinkins, the first African-American mayor of New York City and a former marine." Dinkins was one of the worst political leaders of recent American history. Elected in 1989 after beating incumbent Ed Koch in the Democratic primary (Koch, by the way, has endorsed President Bush), Dinkins was supposed to be a "racial healer," New York having recently been roiled by a couple of high-profile racist crimes committed by whites against blacks.
Instead, during the Dinkins administration almost every summer saw an outbreak of racial violence--the difference being that the perpetrators belonged to "oppressed" minorities. It took Rudy Giuliani to bring real racial peace to New York by getting tough on crime in a colorblind way.
Such a disaster was Dinkins that New York, not exactly a GOP stronghold, has not elected a mayor running as a Democrat in more than 14 years. And Clark is trumpeting his endorsement?
What Would We Do Without Army Leaders?
"Army Leader: War Brings Chances, Obstacles"--headline, Associated Press, Jan. 22
The Thinnest Story Ever
Here's the entire text of a dispatch that moved on the United Press International wires yesterday:
BERLIN, Jan. 22 (UPI)--Al-Qaida leader Osama bin Laden has been captured, Germany's Die Welt newspaper reported Thursday.
The newspaper, on its Web site, cited "unconfirmed reports" as the basis for its report.
Bin Laden is the Saudi dissident blamed for the Sept. 11, 2001, attacks on New York and Washington that killed nearly 3,000 people. He was believed to be hiding along the Afghan-Pakistan border.
At least UPI took the time to explain who this bin Laden guy is everyone's been talking about.
We'll Always Have Paris
Today's New York Times carries this correction (third item):
The Public Lives profile on Wednesday, about Michael Arad, an Israeli who is one of the designers of the "Reflecting Absence" memorial to be built at ground zero, misstated the location where he served in an infantry reconnaissance unit in the Israeli army. It was in the West Bank, not the Left Bank.
When an editor confronted Robin Finn, author of the profile (since corrected online), with the error, Finn pleaded guilty but in Seine.
Babies Having Babies
A Reuters dispatch describes Laci Peterson as "a pregnant California woman whose husband is charged with murdering her and the fetus of her unborn child." How did her unborn child get pregnant?
You Don't Say--II
"Faulty Medical Devices Can Pose Patient Hazard"--headline, Salt Lake Tribune, Jan. 22
What Would We Do Without the FDA?
"FDA: Misusing Painkillers Can Be Deadly"--headline, Associated Press, Jan. 23
These Guys Don't Waste Any Time
"Traveling Exhibit on Moon Is Planned"--headline, Kansas City Star, Jan. 23
"Local Astronomers Host Mars Event"--headline, Grand Forks (N.D.) Herald, Jan. 23
What Would Potty-Mouthed Parrots Do Without Churchill Experts?
"Potty-Mouthed Parrot a Stranger to Us, Say Churchill Experts"--headline, FoxNews.com (second item), Jan. 22
They Sold Their Soul for a Hockey Goal
"Satan Helps Sabres Get Past Bruins"--headline, Winston-Salem (N.C.) Journal, Jan. 23
Word Up
Awhile back, we started an effort to popularize the word kerfuffle. Some of our more intransigent readers subjected us to raillery on the ground that our verbiage was too rarefied. We were right not to be lachrymose, for it turns out we were downright mantic. Our kerfuffle campaign has reached a climacteric thanks to the folks at Merriam-Webster, who've declared it their "word of the day."
M-W provides a compendious treatment of the meaning and history of kerfuffle. Among other things, it refutes those who accused us of malapropism for shortening it to fuffle. As it turns out, our critics were the ones who needed to get a clew. The word originated as fuffle in Scottish English in the 16th century. The later addition of the prefix car-, later standardized to ker-, "didn't change the meaning of the word considerably."
We're certainly grateful to the Merriam-Webster folks for scuppering our critics, but we hope they're not expecting a quid pro quo or other remuneration.
(Elizabeth Crowley helps compile Best of the Web Today. Thanks to Tipton Cole, Justin Taylor, Jim Orheim, Barak Moore, Nicholas Zeisler, Steve Prestegard, Mark Wallace, Steve Bunten, Sam Blume, C.E. Dobkin, Don Pugh, Jennifer Ray, Joshua Stanton, Mark Main, Christian Metts, Mathew Lu, Stephen Owens, Evan Graham, Yehuda Hilewitz, Lawrence Greenfield, Richard Haisley, Edward Hildebrand, Daryl Duwe, Rod Pennington, S. Murphy, Russ Daniel and Scott McEachin. If you have a tip, write us at opinionjournal@wsj.com, and please include the URL.) |
