The first client state America had to go to war with was the Northwestern Indian nations supported by George III's British colonialists. Early Americans had taught themselves how to kill squirrels with old, smooth-bore flintlocks. Under the leadership of shrewd generals like Mad Anthony Wayne and others, American sharpshooters cleared the midwest of both the Indians and their British puppetmasters.
Today, modern American squirrel hunters are after the contemporary hostile tribes of primitives in Iraq and, eventually, the REST of the untamed Middle East. Don't bet against them THIS time, either.
As for the squirrels at home, they are all nesting in the new tree of anti-Americanism, the Democratic party. We have only to chase them away to restore America's glory. The domestic squirrel hunters will take care of THAT with the old, smoothbore BALLOT BOXES this November.
It's squirrel season in America, too, and you have to get up early, or you don't eat... |
