BUSH BY THE NUMBERS:
#16: As you might recall, Abraham Lincoln was the Sixteenth President of the United States. What do you think would happen if George Bush met Honest Abe.....
But seriously, I heard that just the other night, George W. was awakened in the White House by the ghost of George Washington, I kid you not. And the president asks the ghost, "Mr. Washington, sir, what is the best thing I can do to help the American people?" And Washington's ghost says, "Set an honest and honorable example, George W., just as I did."
So the next night, the ghost of Thomas Jefferson appears before Bush in the dark bedroom. "Mr. Jefferson, sir," W. asks, "what's the best thing I can do to help the American people?" And Jefferson's ghost says, "Preserve the land for future generations and stay out of foreign affairs."
The president wasn't sleeping well at all the next night and wouldn't you know, he sees yet another figure moving in the shadows. It's the ghost of Abraham Lincoln. "Mr. Lincoln, sir, what is the best thing I can do to help the American people?" W. asks. And Lincoln's ghost says, "Go see a play." |
