Best of the Web Today - May 19, 2004
By JAMES TARANTO
'Very Small Traces'
Imagine if some malicious prankster were to make his way into the offices of the New York Times, find editorial page editor Gail Collins, and pour a gallon of milk over her head. Then imagine if he defended himself by saying he had used only "very small traces" of milk.
Bizarre as it may sound, that's the tack the Times is taking toward the discovery earlier this week of an artillery shell containing sarin in Iraq. Although, as we noted yesterday, the volume of the sarin is between three quarts and a gallon, the Times insists that field tests found only "very small traces of sarin."
The Times continues protesting Saddam Hussein's innocence, suggesting that he did away with his weapons in "a large-scale destruction program" from which only "some residual weapons" may have "escaped"--never mind that U.N. resolutions obliged Saddam to destroy all his weapons and to document their destruction.
Anyway, the Times says, maybe this sarin doesn't really exist. "At this point no one can be certain whether the artillery shell rigged as a roadside bomb really did contain deadly sarin and, if so, what significance that may have."
That's funny, we seem to remember reading somewhere that "the discovery of the sarin-filled shell appears to offer some of the most substantial evidence to date that Mr. Hussein did not destroy all of the banned chemical agent, as he claimed before the war last year." Where was that again?
Oh yes, in the New York Times! But as we noted yesterday, the paper buried the sarin story on page 11. We suppose Collins and her staff can't be troubled to read that deeply into their own paper.
What Would We Do Without Reports?
"Sept. 11 Attacks Exposed Readiness Flaws, Report Says"--headline, Bloomberg News, May 19
What Would We Do Without Some on Panel?
"Some on Panel Fear New York Still Vulnerable"--headline, Omaha World-Herald, May 19
Blair Takes a Powder
If you think your homeland has security problems, get a load of this BBC report:
A major review of security is under way after a condom full of purple flour was thrown at Tony Blair as he faced MPs in the House of Commons.
The PM was speaking during his weekly half-hour question and answer session when the projectile hit his back, prompting MPs to evacuate the chamber.
The apparent culprits were a pair of men whose group, Fathers 4 Justice, seeks to "help fathers gain access to children through the courts," the BBC adds. "It is believed the suspects got tickets to the Commons at a charity auction."
A "source" tells the Beeb that, in the network's words, "the attack would have been 'incredibly serious' if the dyed flour had been anthrax or ricin." What would we do without sources?
Prison in Prison Abuse Case
That was quick. Spc. Jeremy Sivits, the first soldier to be court-martialed in the Abu Ghraib abuses, pleaded guilty and was sentenced to a year in prison today, the Associated Press reports:
Sivits, who pleaded guilty to four abuse charges, broke down in tears as he expressed remorse for taking pictures of naked Iraqi prisoners being humiliated.
"I'd like to apologize to the Iraqi people and those detainees," he said in his statement. "I should have protected those detainees, not taken the photos."
Under Sivits's plea agreement, he is to testify against other soldiers. Last week, as we noted, Ted Kennedy railed that "Saddam's torture chambers reopened under new management: U.S. management." How many of his own men did Saddam court-martial for abusing prisoners?
Not that everyone will be satisfied. "If they actually committed such offenses, they should be executed," the Associated Press quotes one Iraqi man as saying. There's nothing like having a sense of proportion.
And Look at the Thanks We Got
"US Tried to Keep Red Cross Out of Jail"--headline, (Melbourne) Age, May 20
Good News Watch
Blogger Arthur Chrenkoff has an excellent, and long, roundup of good news from Iraq, along with links. Here's a very brief summary:
Several parts of the country are already holding local elections.
Iraqis are wealthier, and their health and education systems are better.
Iraq's culture is undergoing a revival. The national soccer team beat Saudi Arabia for a place in the Olympics, Kurdish music albums are selling big, and the Marsh Arabs are coming back and restoring the environment that Saddam Hussein wrecked.
Reconstruction is going well.
Outside Fallujah and some parts of the south, the security situation is good.
Nine Iraqis whose hands Saddam's regime amputated are getting prosthetic ones thanks to American volunteers, as our Dan Henninger noted last week.
Other Middle Eastern countries are beginning to make reformist noises.
The really pathetic thing is that there are Americans who view all this as bad news because they'd rather see Iraq fail than President Bush succeed.
Hey Kids, Wanna Process and Synthesize?
The New York Times Learning Network has brought back its "lesson plan" on Abu Ghraib, which it had quickly pulled down after we noted it last week. The plan has been sanitized and jargoned up; whereas before it promised to teach kids about "writing letters to protest American abuse of Iraqi prisoners," here's the new description:
In this lesson, students process the news of the abuse of Iraqi prisoners in American custody and explore international laws that dictate the treatment of prisoners of war and detainees. To synthesize their understanding of these laws and their own views of the situation, students compose Letters to the Editor.
Forget dull old reading and writing; thanks to the New York Times, kids are learning to "process" and "synthesize." The new lesson plan also no longer urges kids to read the Al-Jazeera Web site, but it does ask them to consider if the Arab network would have been a "better choice" for President Bush's interview than the U.S.-backed Al Hurra.
We Get Results
AmericasDumbestSoldiers.com, the hate-America site we noted Friday, seems to have vanished from the face of the Web.
'America Is on the Offensive'
Yesterday we urged President Bush to be more bold and definitive in making the case for the continuing war against terrorists. We were happy to learn that a few hours earlier he had done just that, in a speech before the American Israel Public Affairs Committee:
Not all terrorist networks answer to the same orders and same leaders, but all terrorists burn with the same hatred. They hate all who reject their grim vision of tyranny. They hate people who love freedom. They kill without mercy. They kill without shame. And they count their victories in the death of the innocent.
We saw the nature of this enemy again in recent days when terrorists in Iraq beheaded an American citizen, Nicholas Berg. The message that accompanied the videotape of this brutal slaying promised more such atrocities. Here's what the killer said, "We will send you coffin after coffin, box after box, slaughtered in this way." The faces of the terrorists were cloaked, but we have seen their kind before. . . .
America is on the offensive, and we will stay on the offensive until the terrorists are stopped and our people are safe.
This is good, and we hope the president will keep it up.
Eeyore's Gloomy Place
The Boston Globe reports that John Kerry, speaking yesterday in Oregon, had this to say about his vision of America: ''Too many people have been sort of cast aside--no health insurance, no ability to get child care for their kids, no ability to find a job that fits what they were educated for, no ability to get ahead even though they're working harder."
Man, why is he in such a good mood?
Along similar lines, reader Tom Neven offers this report from the field:
I was visiting the student activities office at George Washington University in D.C. this week. The College Republicans have a display with images from 9/11, Bush speeches, and Republican platform items.
The College Democrats display features:
Inflatable paddles called "Bush Whackers."
An "Anyone But Bush" bumper sticker.
Several pictures of Bush with various expressions on his face with pictures of chimps or orangutans with similar expressions.
A John Kerry shirt.
Nothing positive. No Democratic platform items. No vision for America. Nothing but things attacking Bush. Juvenile things, at that.
Those poor College Democrats, sort of cast off with no ability to do anything.
Sure Enough, They're Both Still White
"Kerry-Nader Meeting Unlikely to Alter Race"--headline, Associated Press, May 19
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Hurricane Wobegon
"There is a 50 percent probability that the 2004 Atlantic hurricane season will have above-normal activity, the National Oceanic and Atmosphere Administration (NOAA) said in its outlook," Reuters reports.
So what's the probability it'll have below-normal activity?
What Would Children Do Without Police?
"Police Urge Caution to Prevent Children Falling Out Windows"--headline, Union Leader (Manchester, N.H.), May 19
Colonel Mustard With the Tire Iron
The Seattle Post-Intelligencer ("Intelligent as a post!") reports on police efforts to crack "recent wave of wheel snatchings," which has left "dozens of car owners around the city" with their cars on blocks:
Last Thursday, a Mill Creek police officer stopped a rented U-Haul truck cruising in a residential neighborhood at 2 a.m.
In the back, the officer found cinder blocks and all the tools needed to quickly remove a set of tires.
"In law enforcement, we call that a clue," Mill Creek police spokeswoman Becky Erk said.
Wow, Becky, that's really enlightening. Can you tell us where to find one?
The Easy Way to Persuade
Student columnist David Weigel is urging his peers not to vote. He writes in the Daily Northwestern that in 2000 "I badgered students I hardly knew with talking points on why they needed to vote and what was at stake." Not anymore:
It doesn't particularly matter whether Northwestern students vote. It doesn't matter to the world at large and it doesn't matter to our Evanston neighbors. . . . I wouldn't suggest that students actually restrain their friends from voting. Punching a vote card isn't going to get anyone hurt. But it's rude to assume your love of politics must be forced upon your peers. If they don't want to vote, they've got nothing to lose.
Does this remind anyone else of Joycelyn Elders? She was the surgeon general Bill Clinton sacked a decade or so ago for suggesting that schools should encourage teenagers to masturbate.
Now, while Elders's suggestion might have been a bit gross, there is something to be said in its favor. Teaching kids, say, to do algebra or write an essay is hard. But if the educational system encourages them to do something they're going to do anyway, it is much more likely to be successful. Likewise, encouraging college students to get involved with politics is a losing battle. But exhort them not to, and chances are they'll do just what you say. |
