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Politics : Foreign Affairs Discussion Group
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To: longnshort who wrote (141534)7/26/2004 9:30:01 PM
From: Dr. Id  Read Replies (1) of 281500
 
> REPUBLICAN NATIONAL COMMITTEE CONVENTION SCHEDULE
>
> New York 2004
>
>  6:00 PM  Opening Prayer led by the Reverend Jerry Falwell
>  6:30 PM  Pledge of Allegiance
>  6:35 PM  Burning of Bill of Rights (excluding 2nd Amendment)
>  6:45 PM  Salute to the Coalition of the Willing
>  6:46 PM  Seminar #1: Getting Your Kid a Military Deferment
>  7:30 PM  First Presidential Beer Bong
>  7:35 PM  Serve Freedom Fries
>  7:40 PM EPA Address #1: Mercury, It's What's For Dinner.
>  8:00 PM  Vote on which country to invade next
>  8:10 PM  Call EMTs to revive Rush Limbaugh
>  8:15 PM  John Ashcroft Lecture: The Homos Are After Your Children
>  8:30 PM  Round table discussion on reproductive rights (MEN only)
>  8:50 PM  Seminar #2: Corporations - The Government of the Future
>  9:00 PM  Condi Rice sings "Can't Help Lovin' Dat Man"
>  9:05 PM  Second Presidential Beer Bong
>  9:10 PM  EPA Address #2 Trees: The Real Cause of Forest Fires
>  9:30 PM  Break for secret meetings
>  10:00 PM  Second prayer led by Cal Thomas
>  10:15 PM  Lecture by Karl Rove: Doublespeak Made Easy
>  10:30 PM  Donald Rumsfeld demonstration of how to squint and talk
> macho
>  10:35 PM  George W. Bush demonstration of trademark
> deer-in-headlights stare
>  10:40 PM  John Ashcroft demonstrates new mandatory Kevlar chastity
> belt
>  10:45 PM  Clarence Thomas reads list of black Republicans
>  10:46 PM  Third Presidential Beer Bong
>  10:50 PM  Seminar #3: Education - A Drain on Our Nation's Economy.
>  11:10 PM  Hilary Clinton pinata
>  11:20 PM Second Lecture by John Ashcroft: Evolutionists - The
> Dangerous New Cult
>  11:30 PM Call EMTs to revive Rush Limbaugh again.
>  11:35 PM Blame Clinton
>  11:40 PM Laura serves milk and cookies
>  11:50 PM Closing Prayer led by Jesus Himself
>  12:00 AM Nomination of George W. Bush as Holy Supreme Planetary
> Overlord
>
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