LGF - The Fluffly Puffled Davos Kerfufflet
Rather like A. J. Weberman, Iowahawk is becoming world-renowned for his dumpster-diving prowess. Today he came up with another gem, behind the Manhattan offices of the Wall Street Journal—the first draft of the now-infamous “kerfuffle” editorial:
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THE FLUFFLY PUFFLED DAVOS KERFUFFLET
By The Wall Street Journal Editorial Board
We stand in mildly shocked bemusement at the chest-thumping triumphalism of the blogosphere, engaged in another ritual onanistic victory howl over their latest “scalp” — beloved CNN Executive News Chief Eason Jordan.
As we look over this sordid scene out of Lord of the Flies, we cannot help but wonder whether the entire business of “blogs” has now taken us to a level of media-butchery that is no longer good for society, nor even the Editorial Board community itself. We applauded the blogosphere for its role in toppling Howell Raines and Dan Rather, but Mr. Jordan is another matter altogether.
First, we must note that the kerfuffle concerns remarks Mr. Jordan at a tiny, intimate gathering in Switzerland. These were not meant for public review, and, at our last check, making remarks in Switzerland is still legal under the First Amendment. This strikes us as a gross violation of Mr. Jordan’s right to speak out in public privacy.
Second, the headhunters of the blogosphere have attempted to make much of the fact that Bret Stephens, the brilliant and handsome young member of the WSJ Editorial Board, was on hand, and that We, or rather, Mr. Stevens, was there at the behest of Mr. Jordan, and that this somehow has colored the editorial judgment of We, I mean Mr. Stephens.
We think that this is ludicrous. Mr. Stephens was only one of thousands at the tiny, private EWF conference, so if there is a “conspiracy” it is an odd one at that. We know Mr. Stevens to be a brilliant and insightful thinker, so it is small wonder why Mr. Jordan invited We, I mean Mr. Stephens, to attend, and not to mention that Mr. Stephens is also quite a talented skier.
Mr. Stephens, I mean, We, have all been diminished by the departure of a good man like Mr. Jordan. But the real tragedy of the whole fluffly puffed Davos kerfuffle souffle lies in the how it has exposed the blogs as a pack of ravenous kerfuffle hyenas who would even turn on a brilliant young journalist like we. I mean Bret Stephens. Let Mr. Stephens, I mean us, stop them before it’s too late.
(I don’t really need a “this is a parody” disclaimer here, do I? —ed.) |
