Whatta fine looking audience we have here tonight.
<Clappy sets up the microphone stand up on the NNBM stage
platform and plugs in...>
<Tap. Tap. Tap.>
Testing.
123
Test.
<Polvo adjusts the spot light.>
Good evening ladies and germs!
A vulture boards an airplane, carrying two dead racoons. The
stewardess looks at him and says, "I'm sorry, sir, only one
Carrion allowed per passenger".
<rimshot!>
<sound of crickets chirping.>
Okay...
we got a lively crowd here tonight.
Two Fish swim into a concrete wall. The one turns to the
other and says:
"Dam!"
<rimshot!>
Get it?! Dam. Get it now?
<sound of crickets heckling the boob on stage.>
Two Eskimos sitting in a kayak were chilly, so they lit a
fire in the craft. Unsurprisingly it sank, proving once
again that you can't have your kayak and heat it too.
<double rimshot!>
<Tap. Tap. Tap.>
Testing. 1. 2.
Hello?! Is this thing on?
<crickets begin to toss bug-sized heads of lettuce, cabbage,
tomatoes, and other health food up onto the stage.>
Two hydrogen atoms meet. One says, "I've lost my electron."
The other says "Are you sure?" The first replies, "Yes, I'm
positive."
<a large vaudvillian hook reaches across the NNBM stage in
attempt to remove the bow-tie wearing twit with the
microphone.>
Did you hear the one about...
<The hook finally grabs the stooge by the back pocket and
pulls him from the stage as he ducks the flock of low flying
salad.>
Good night everbuddy!
You've been wunderful!
-HennysViolin |
