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Politics : I Will Continue to Continue, to Pretend....
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To: Sully- who wrote (11937)12/6/2005 3:53:41 AM
From: Sully-   of 35834
 
Dems Urge Bush to Use Secret Weapon to End War

By Scott Ott on Global News
Satire from ScrappleFace

(2005-12-05) — Formerly-prominent Democrats today called on President George Bush to deploy a top-secret defense technology to end the U.S. occupation of Iraq, bring the troops home and restore America’s global credibility.

In a letter, signed by dozens of progressive intellectuals, Democrats called on the president to release from the U.S. arsenal a classified system known as the XOXO Dynamic Power Vacuum.

Former Secretary of State Madeleine K. Albright, former U.N. Ambassador Richard Holbrooke, former presidential candidate John F. Kerry, former NATO Commander Gen. Wesley Clark and former National Security Adviser Zbigniew Brzezinski are among the formerly-respected Democrat leaders who say Mr. Bush should order the Pentagon immediately to replace 150,000 U.S. troops with a strategically-placed Dynamic Power Vacuum in the heart of the Arab world.

A defense industry analyst at the Hoover Institution called the XOXO a “highly-effective weapon of mass suction which could make U.S. willpower obsolete.”

Sen. John F. Kerry said deploying the Power Vacuum would be a “bold, progressive solution that would quickly render the Iraqi people defenseless, thus accomplishing the Democrat party’s primary foreign policy goal in the Middle East.”

scrappleface.com
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