Suspicious Teacher Arrested
At New York's Kennedy airport today, an individual
later discovered to be a public school teacher was arrested
trying to board a flight while in possession of a ruler, a
protractor, a setsquare, a slide rule, and a calculator. At a
morning press conference, Attorney General Alberto Gonzales
said he believes the man is a member of the notorious Al-gebra
movement. He is being charged by the FBI with carrying
weapons of math instruction.
"Al-gebra is a fearsome cult," Gonzales said. "They
desire average solutions by means and extremes, and sometimes
go off on tangents in a search of absolute values. They use
secret code names like 'x' and 'y' and refer to themselves as
'unknowns,' but we have determined they belong to a
common denominator of the axis of medieval with coordinates
in every country. As the Greek philanderer Isosceles used to
say, 'there are 3 sides to every triangle'."
When asked to comment on the arrest, President Bush
said, "If God had wanted us to have better weapons of math
instruction, He would have given us more fingers and toes".
- end -
or should I say "QED" as we (they) do in the math world ? |
