I found that style tended to piss people off- sometimes permanently- as is obviously the case with you, and JLA. Thank you for helping to make my point that such behavior can be so destructive as to make people angry at you... forever. I don't find that particularly productive, nor did I understand just how long people would hold grudges. That's not phoniness. That's seeing that a particular way of acting has consequences that are long lasting, and negative, and choosing to alter one's course based on experience. When I find a strategy to be a failure, I quit using it.
Of course that doesn't make people like you forget, once one changes strategy- you can, of course, go back 8 years and find all sorts of posts just like that, many about you- but again, that proves my point about the destructive nature of rude communications. I would never say I was not extremely good at cutting people to the quick in a fire fight- I mean people don't hate you unless you score some good points, but I would say I didn't find it produced what I wanted, and I didn't understand how seriously people would take it.
We are not "phony" when we do not give vent to every rude thought that comes through our mind. IMO, of course. |
