Happy 4th!
Ever wondered what happens when Hallmark writers are having a bad day?
>My tire was thumping.
>I thought it was flat
>When I looked at the tire...
>I noticed your cat.
>Sorry!
>~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
> Heard your wife left you,
>How upset you must be.
>But don't fret about it...
>She moved in with me.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
>Looking back over the years
>that we've been together,
I can't help but wonder...
>"What the hell was I thinking?"
> ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
>Congratulations on your wedding day!
>Too bad no one likes your husband.
>! !
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
>How could two people as beautiful as you
>Have such an ugly baby?
> ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
>I've always wanted to have
>someone to hold,
>someone to love.
>After having met you .
>
>I've changed my mind.
>----------------------------------------------------------
> I must admit, you brought Religion into my life.
>I never believed in Hell until I met you.
_________________________________________
>As the days go by, I think of how lucky I am...
>That you're not here to ruin it for me.
> ####################################################
>Congratulations on your promotion.
>Before you go...
>Would you like to take this knife out of my back?
>You'll probably need it again.
>*************************************************************
>Happy Birthday, Uncle Dad!
>(Available only in Tennessee , Kentucky , West Virginia & Arkansas )
>~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
>
>Happy birthday! You look great for your age.
>
>Almost Lifelike!
> ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
>When we were together,
>you always said you'd die for me.
>Now that we've broken up,
>
>I think it's time you kept your promise.
>///////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////
>We have been friends for a very long time .
>
>let's say we stop?
>+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
>
>I'm so miserable without you
>
>it's almost like you're here.
>=====================================================
>Congratulations on your new bundle of joy.
>Did you ever find out who the father was?
> %%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%
>
>Your friends and I wanted to do
>something special for your birthday.
>
>So we're having you put to sleep.
>)))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))
>So your daughter's a hooker,
>and it spoiled your day.
>Look at the bright side,
>it's really good pay |
