Let us read closely this CorpSpeak utterance by The Pony Tail Party Executive. CorpSpeak utterances are normally devoid of semantic content because they are intended to be so. But there are statistical distributions for everything, even emptiness:
“More than a billion people across the globe, representing nearly every demographic, market and industry, rely upon Java’s security, innovation and value to connect them with opportunity,” CEO Jonathan Schwartz said in a statement. “That awareness positions Sun, and now our investor base, for the future.”
Using a couple of simplifications, we get:
"More than a billion people across the globe" = 'customers'
"..representing nearly every demographic, market, and industry" = 'many'
"..rely upon Java's security, innovation and value to connect them with opportunity" = 'use Java'.
"That awareness positions Sun, and now our investor base, for the future" = 'want investors remember Sun'
Provisional translation into simpler American English: "Many customers use Java. We changed our stock symbol to JAVA to help investors remember we exist."
I wonder how much that PR writer gets paid, and how far his options are back-dated.
--QS |
