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Pastimes : Discussion Thread
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To: c.hinton who wrote (3043)12/15/2008 11:34:28 AM
From: one_less  Read Replies (1) of 3816
 
Making social comparisons, especially of one's children is damaging to their psyche. A comment that starts with 'why can't you be more like ...,' is like a dagger to the heart of a child.

Referring to an older child as a role model for younger ones is appropriate as long as it is clear that there is room for choice and individuality.

Children have varying dispositions, talents, interests, and abilities but that should never lead to a comparison which is measured as approval, acceptability, or love from a parent. In healthy families where there is a child with a disability, that child is just as loved as the others. Why would it be any different in healthy families where all the children fall in the norm range.
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