Comic Relief: "It could have been worse"
(Long joke, hang in there)
A very pessimistic guy over the years develops a patent answer
for any and all bad news he hears: "it could have been worse."
Whatever it happens to be, he thinks "it could have been worse."
Earthquake in Italy, hunger in N. Korea, Cymer stock kicked in
the teeth -- "it could have been worse."
So one day, his friends plot to tell him something so bad, so obviously
tragic, that he can't snap back with his knee-jerk
"it could have been worse" -- because it will be "the worst."
They find him in the neighborhood bar the next day and start to
reel him in:
"So, John, did you hear what happened to your neighbor, Bill?"
"No."
"Well, he came home early from work -- having lost a ton in
the market that day and feeling like hell :( -- only to find
his wife in bed with his best fried. He blew a fuse, shot his
friend, strangled his wife and killed himself."
"Wow, just when think you know somebody..."
At this point, his friends start to chuckle deep down inside
(remember Thursday night?) because he didn't snap back
with his usual "it could have been worse."
But, of course, after a few minutes, he says, "but if you really
think about it, it could have been worse."
His friends can't understand his thinking (remember Friday?). They
say, "but John, how could it possibly have been worse! His wife was
cheating on him with his best friend, he killed probably the two
people closest to him, and he killed himself. How the $%#@
could it have been worse?"
"Well, it could have happened the day before yesterday, when I was
there visiting his wife!" |
