The Differences Between Conservatives and Liberals
If a conservative doesn't like guns, he doesn`t buy one.
If a liberal doesn't like guns, he wants all guns outlawed.
If a conservative is a vegetarian, he doesn`t eat meat.
If a liberal is a vegetarian, he wants all meat products banned for everyone.
If a conservative sees a foreign threat, he thinks about how to defeat his enemy.
A liberal wonders how to surrender gracefully and still look good.
If a conservative is homosexual, he quietly leads his life.
If a liberal is homosexual, he demands legislated respect.
If a black man or Hispanic are conservative, they see themselves as independently successful.
If liberal, they see themselves as victims deserving government protection.
If a conservative is down-and-out, he thinks about how to better his situation.
A liberal looks for government to take care of him.
If a conservative doesn't like a talk show host, he switches channels.
Liberals demand that those they don't like be shut down.
If a conservative is a non-believer, he doesn't go to church.
A liberal non-believer wants any mention of God and religion to be silenced.
(Uh -- unless it's a foreign religion, of course!)
If a conservative decides he needs health care, he goes about shopping for it, or finds a job that provides it.
A liberal demands that the rest of us pay for his insurance, even if he is already sick.
If a conservative slips and falls in a store, he gets up, laughs and feels embarrassed.
If a liberal slips and falls, he grabs his neck, moans like he's in labor, and then sues.
If a conservative reads this, he'll send it to his friends so they can have a good laugh.
A liberal will delete it because he's "offended". |
