How to translate the DDIM third quarter results press release:
For any relatively new lurkers, I wanted to help translate today's press release. Larry Martin studied English as a second language. His native tongue is positive spinese. Certain idioms in spinese are difficult to translate to English and are sometimes misintepreted. Therefore, I offer the following translation:
Data Dimensions Reports Record 3rd-Qtr Revenue and Earnings Company Says Strong Year 2000 Growth Trend is Continuing
We didn't do much business last year. Its too bad we didn't do even less as our growth rates would appear higher. Growth is nowhere near what we promised people, but it is still greater than zero!
'We expect the number of international licensees to grow steadily. As the power of our global resellers extends our reach across the world we are already seeing Ardes 2k orders coming in from places we never anticipated, such as Malaysia,'' said Larry Martin
I know we promised significant Ardes 2K sales in the US (and Japan) but they aren't materializing. But hey, we did sell one in Malaysia! Did I meniton Uruguay?
'To meet this demand for our services we expect to have in place 500 employees by year end, compared to 200 at the beginning of the year. In the third quarter we also established a subsidiary in the United Kingdom and opened a software factory in North Carolina.
I know I said we'd hire a CFO and 2 Sr VPs to replace the COO by the end of September. But what qualified individual would work here? (I'm only here because I get to buy 300,000 shares of stock at $1.25 every quarter). I know we need more than 1,400 employees to even have a chance of doing $100 mm in revenues, but hey, its even hard to keep entry level guys here (I never liked the Ardes development team anyway). Anyway we're going to hire some people. Sometime.
"When it comes to consulting assignments, we are in the enviable position of selecting high-margin business. The margins on our consulting assignments are exceeding the industry average.''
Due to employee constraints (see above) we can barely process existing backlog, much less bid for new work. Also, its tough competing against larger, better capitalized companies, like Keane. We couldn't book much additional backlog this quarter. But hey, we didn't want that low margin business anyway.
He pointed out that two major international oil companies said there was a possibility that the Year 2000 problem could shut down offshore North Sea oil production for months. Martin added that Federal Reserve Governor Edward Kelly this week told Congress that U.S. offices of foreign banks may pose some of the biggest risks to the U.S. banking system because, Kelly said, ''they may not have an adequate appreciation of the magnitude and ramification'' of the Year 2000 problem.
Typical necessary scare tactics to keep retail investors hanging on to this dog stock. Yadayadayada. Gartner group, please keep this ruse going a few more quarters, so I can keep cashing in my options! |
