I did not have parents who had a good relationship. You have made an incorrect assumption. I had a mother who was nuts (really nuts- like medicated with lithium nuts) and who yelled and screamed at my dad- so loudly all the neighbors could hear. And my dad was an alcoholic, which no doubt strained my already nutty mother. They fought all the time- with my mother, who used to strangle herself in front of me saying she would kill herself, from as early as I can remember- frequently running out of the house saying she was running off for good. But together I think they were probably better off than alone- and I, their child, was certainly better off with the two of them, than with either unstable portion of them.
I am not judging you. I am merely suggesting that for MOST people (perhaps not you), and especially for people with kids, no fault divorce has been a terrible terrible idea. You can of course disagree- but to say I have not seen dysfunction in its most glorious flowering is to make a mistake. I have seen things you cannot even imagine, and which I will not shame my parents by speaking of. But even seeing those things, I think most people are stronger together, and stronger working things out, than going forth to be serial failures- as I am quite sure my parents would have done (my father, after all, had already been divorced by his first wife.)
Apparently my opinion struck a nerve with you and you do not feel I deserve to have my opinion- and needed to guess about my personal life- but you guessed wrong. I understand this is an emotional topic. I disagree, respectfully, with what you have to say- and I am really much more concerned with families where children are involved.
PS- I don't believe divorce is immoral. I don't actually believe in morality at all. There is merely what is practical and what is not. I merely see divorce as impractical and counter productive for society and families. Too much money for divorce lawyers, too little care for children (see, again with the children- it's really families with kids I am concerned about.)
Pss- i hope none of this comes off as snarky, or in any way mean. I am told some times I come off that way when I totally don't intend to. I am just trying to be honest, and to correct some assumptions you have made that are incorrect. I hope I did it in a nice way. I meant to do it in a nice way. |
