'Lexa and Br'er Possum
When I was in college I got a frantic call from my mother one afternoon. Seems she felt she had a giant rat living in the garage. "Its eating the cat's food," she wailed. "How big?" I asked. "Like a cat" she said. Hmmmmmm. So I asked for a more complete descritpion. Long hairless tail, BIG teeth, etc etc. Curiosity got the better of me so I went hunting in mom's garage. I heard stealthy rustlings under my fathers toolchests. But every time I pulled out a drawer, whatever IT was scampered away. Finally I got the bright idea of just pulling out every drawer. Then I found it cowering in a corner. A large, unhappy, possum. It hissed at me, constantly. SSSSSSSsssssssSSSSSsssssSSSSS..... I poked it with a broom. More and louder hissing. I called animal control. They would collect it, but it had to be in a container. Right. No problem, they said, possums are slow...grab it by the tail, just don't let it turn on you. Uh huh. I tried grabbing it by the tail, but even though possums are slow they aren't THAT slow. So I laid a garbage can on the ground and spanked the possum with a broom till it got in the can. Then tipped the can up and slammed on the lid, fearing for my life.
Animal control lady had BIG gauntlets and grabbed the sucker out of my trashcan and threw it in the truck. She said they were going to let it go up in the hills. But now I wonder...maybe she et it. |
