"During a speech, Castro asks: "Is there one, only one among you, who is hungry?" A poor hapless man raises his hands. He is immediately seized by the police and forced to drink a glass of water, then another, and yet another, until he has drunk ten altogether. Then Castro asks him: "Are you still hungry?" The man replies: "No, Comandante, I am not hungry." "Well, you see," replies Fidel, "you really weren't hungry; what you were was thirsty."
In the middle of a speech Fidel is interrupted by a man who cries out: "We want the oppression of the people to end." "Arrest that man," Castro orders. "No, you can't do that," the dissident protests, "because the Socialist Constitution guarantees the right of free speech." "Yes, you are very right," replies Fidel: "Arrest instead everyone who heard him."
In another speech, Fidel tells the people: "We only have wood chips to eat." The people chant in unison: "Give us wood chips, give us wood chips!" A week later, Fidel tells them: "Now we only have stones to eat." And the people shout: "Give us stones, give us stones!" Six months later, Fidel tells the people: "Good news! A ship with humanitarian assistance (food) has just arrived in the port of Havana." And the people shout :"Give us teeth, give us teeth!"
Before the Revolution, there used to be a sign at the Havana Zoo that read: "Please Don't Feed the Animals." After Castro had been in power a couple of years, it was changed to: "Please Don't Take the Animals' Food." Eventually, however, even this was not enough. The sign now reads: "Please Don't Eat the Animals." |
