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Creeptastic NRA ad suggests the perfect woman is an assault weapon deathandtaxesmag.com
If you are anything like me, after the Isla Vista massacre happened, you thought to yourself, “Gee! I wonder what tacky and horrifically insensitive thing the NRA will be coming out with in the aftermath!” Well, here we are friends. A super creepy video that follows some sexxxy lady around talking about how great she is, except that in the end, she’s supposed to actually be a gun. Because really dudes, who needs a woman when you can have an assault rifle?
“She doesn’t look away because she’s shy. She just doesn’t play your games. When overlooked, it’s not a bother. Because she knows what she’s made of. She doesn’t need affirmation, but gives it to you always. Comfortable alone, steady among others. She lives in the moment. Tough. She leaves you sad for all the moments you missed, but grateful for the thrills ahead. Beautiful. Not Miss America Beauty. Tank top, tights, natural beauty. She’s independent, athletic. She hangs with the marathon runners, the yoga masters, and the [mumbly thing that sounds like "gangers?"]. Her future’s mapped out, but her days are wide open. Because hidden underneath is an adventure. She is Daniel Defense A4-A1?
There’s so much here. It goes to so many creepy places. The woman/gun does not mind being ignored and doesn’t need anything from you, except to tell you how super great you are. She’s also like, a super hot chick, but not the kind who thinks she’s too hot for you. I don’t know about you, but I definitely never interpret the “beautiful but doesn’t know it” maxim as “beautiful, but with low enough self-esteem to be grateful if I tell her she’s pretty.”
I also like how they threw in “yoga masters”–as if to insinuate that people who are really into inner peace are also really into assault weapons. Like “Ha! You thought only weird hicks like those dudes who infiltrated Chili’s brandishing AK-47's were into assault weapons! Not so. Peaceful hippies love them too.” Or something.
I’m guessing that the end here is supposed to be like, a Shyamalan twist-thing where you think they’re talking about the woman, but it’s been the gun all along. But why is the gun wearing a tank top and tights? Why is anyone wearing a tank top and tights outside of the house? Does the NRA not know the difference between tights and leggings? Because if you wear tights by themselves, everyone will see your underwear or lack thereof. Even the opaque ones!
