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Pastimes : Don't Ask Rambi

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To: BlueCrab who wrote (5486)	12/23/1997 10:20:00 PM
From: Rambi	Read Replies (3) of 71178

A YULETIDE MESSAGE FROM YOUR CEO: Rambi: I don't wanna do this. penni: Let me just add a little blusher! You're too pale. IO: Just read the teleprompter-I wrote it all out for you. Rambi: I can't read that thing. It's moving. IO: Well-just say something about the joy and peace of the season...and how the thread has had a prosperous year thanks to the efforts of all the contributors... Rambi: What's he talking about? penni: Tuck your blouse in! Button those top buttons, for heaven's sake! You look like a hooker. IO: Look-just say that you appreciate all the hard work everyone has done this year and that they all contributed to the bottom line of over 5000 posts-and you couldn't have done it alone. Rambi: Why would I want to? Who wanted all those posts anyway? I never saw such a bunch of long-winded--- penni: Where are your shoes!!! Rambi: You told me not to wear my boots, damn it. IO: Wait wait--I'm thinking! Look-just say that you are proud to be a member of such a great team-- Rambi: I'm not a member of anything. penni: Have you combed your hair this week? This month?? My god, I think there's a bird's nest in it.. Rambi: You're really getting on my nerves. IO: Look-just say that um--you're glad to be here to wish all of them a wonderful holiday season and ... Rambi: WHo is this guy? penni: He's in charge of PR and Information Services. He's very good, really. If you'd just listen.... Rambi: I'm going to do this my way. IO: What's she doing? Where's she going? Oh my God! I thought you hid that Uzi! penni: I did! Damnit-she's ripping my Chanel suit-and oh no! Where did she get a red and green zebraskin thong! Having her speak was your idea, Jeff! IO: You said you could control her! You said she'd look like Madeline Albright when you got done! Get her away from the mike! Rambi: Hey! Can you hear me out there? All of you! Freddy-shut up a minute. Gaugie, jp, do I have to shoot you? Tell Janice to turn off that buffer. That's better.. Now. They told me I had to say something tonight because I'm the CEO here. So listen up. I"m only saying this once. Thanks for being here and -have a kick ass Christmas. That's it. IO: Oh god. We'll be beeped out. We'll lose all our credibility as a family thread. penni: If she'd just combed her hair... Rambi: I knew I could do it better without the two of you. Now leave me alone.

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