Pete: Per the State of the Union and in the manner of Bob Brinker,
I offer three prospective scenarios.
Scenario #1) Bill Clinton, taking a cue from the strategem employed
by Jimmy Swaggart, declaims only that he has "sinned before Hillary
and, also, God" and spends his hour weeping and sobbing hysterically
before the joint houses of Congress, the Supreme Court, the military
chiefs, the ambassadors, other dignitaries, as well as the American
people and the world.
Outcome: the 60% of women and 40% of men- who, in prior
election cycles, were more than willing to overlook Clinton's
apparent serious character flaws, cowardice, questionable history,
strong hints of deviancy, and penchant for dissimulation- cry with
him and, as is their wont, marvel at his display of pathos. Clinton's
poll numbers rise.
Scenario #2) Bill Clinton, reading from a familiar script tells
the aforementioned assemblage that he "did it for the children."
Outcomes: Some of those close to the dais later swear that, in the
same breath, they heard Clinton mutter wryly, "I also did it to the
children. heh heh."
Touched and weakened by Clinton's expose' of scripted feeling,
Clinton's constituency, as is their wont, marvel at his display
of pathos. Clinton's poll numbers rise.
Scenario #3) William Jefferson Blythe Clinton- for the first time
in his life- stands up like a man, admits his various career mis-
deeds, crimes, and baldfaced lies, and resigns office forthwith
in order to, as he puts it, "accept my fate at the hands of a
justifiably outraged American people."
Outcome: N/A; scenario #3 is inconceivable given the nature of
the beast.
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