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Pastimes : Jokes and Humor Only
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From: Tomato6/11/2021 12:32:13 PM
   of 6636
 
My father was a conjoined twin. We called his brother my uncle on my father's side. Until the operation….

Now he's my uncle once removed.

—

Why did the conjoined twins take a trip to England?

So the other one could drive.

—

I walked in from work today and my wife was sitting on the sofa with my girlfriend.

I said, "What's going on?"

"You tell me?" replied my wife.

I said, "I don't know, you're sitting on the sofa with a stranger."

"A stranger, eh?" shouted my girlfriend, "I'm no stranger, we've been having sex for six months!"

I looked at my wife and said, "Is this true?”

—

A high school senior visits a psychic:



"I've applied to 10 different colleges," the student said. "Which ones will accept me? Which one will I attend?"
"That is hard to say," said the psychic. "But you will spend an absurd sum of money."
"How do you know this?" the student asked.
The psychic replied,
"It's mostly intuition.”
—

What does a Polish bride receive on her wedding night that’s long and hard?



A new last name.
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