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Pastimes : Jokes and Humor Only

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From: Tomato	3/9/2023 4:45:49 PM
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Pre means before and post means after. To use both at the same time would be preposterous! — My girlfriend told me she’s sad because she’s put on a bit of weight I told her to keep her chins up. — Adding a colon can completely change the meaning of a sentence For example: Jeffrey ate John's sandwich. Jeffrey ate John's colon. — Did you know they changed the word “snake" to “essential" And people started buying the oils again. — A blonde walks into a blind date “Nice to meet you” she says to her date as they seat themselves in the booth “So tell me about yourself. What do you do for work?” She asks the man “Oh I’m an optometrist” he replies The blonde flashes a big smile and says “I think this is going to work out after all, I’m a glass half full girl myself.” — My girlfriend did a lie detector test. "According to the results," said the conductor, “Your girlfriend has been unfaithful." I paused for a moment, then said, "Just how reliable are these results?" "Extremely," he replied. "She gave me a blowjob in the parking lot earlier."

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