A famous German proverb: Belgium is like school. It's something you have to go through.
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As the old vegan proverb goes “You can’t make an omelette”
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Your body is your temple is a really terrible proverb to promote chastity. Literally anyone can come inside a temple.
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An old Ethiopian proverb You can't have your cake or eat it.
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Benny gets engaged to a woman and her father tells him he wants to talk to him.
"What do you want?" Benny asks.
"Well, I wanted you to know that you can't shave until you get married or you'll be turned into a vase."
Benny thinks it's a little weird, but he wants to honor what his future father-in-law believes in. As time goes on though he thinks about shaving so he'll look nice for his wedding, but he doesn't. Finally, the day of the wedding comes and he decides he HAS to shave. He does and he gets turned into a vase.
Do you know the moral?
A Benny shaved is a Benny urned.
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A man with an embarrassing condition walks into a bar one day, sad and depressed. He orders a shot, then another, and then another. Finally, the bartenders asks him "hey, what's wrong buddy?". The man replies "I've got this really embarrassing condition, and no doctor has ever been able to figure out how to cure it". The bartender says "well, why don't you tell me about it?".
"Ok", says the man, "you see.....whenever I fart, it comes out HONDA!!!". I've tried everything, changed my diet, stopped drinking beer and eating beans...everything!".
The bartender says "have you tried Chinese herbology?".
"No", says the man.
"Well", says the bartender, "there's a Chinese herbologist right around the corner; it wouldn't hurt to give him a shot".
So, the man goes to see the Chinese herbologist and tells him all about his problem. "Ahhh...", says the herbologist, "you have an abscess in your tooth, you must go to the dentist".
Well, the man hasn't seen a dentist in years and is reluctant to go, but he decides he has to do something about his farts. After his exam, the dentist tells him, yes indeed you have an abscess. The dentist performs the surgery to fix the abscess, and the man's farts return to normal. "This is miraculous!", thinks the man. He goes back to the herbologist to find out how he could possibly know that he had an abscess. "Ah...says the herbologist", ancient Chinese proverb! "Abscess make the fart go honda!”. |