Patient: “Doctor, are the test results ready yet I’m dying of curiosity!”
Doctor: “Actually, not only from curiosity.”
—
As my uncle lay dying, his sisters, Margaret and Christina grieving at his bedside,
he slowly turned to them and said, "Don't cry for me, Marge and Tina.”
—
A DOCTOR at an asylum decided to take his inmates to a baseball game. For weeks in advance, he coached his nutty patients to respond to his commands.
When the day of the game arrived, everything seemed to be going well. As the national anthem started, the doctor yelled: "Up nuts!" And the inmates complied by standing up. After the anthem he yelled: "Down Nuts!" And they all sat. After a home run he yelled: "Cheer nuts!" And they all broke into applause and cheers.
Thinking things were going very well, he decided to go get a beer and a hot dog, leaving his assistant in charge. When he returned there was a riot in progress. Finding his assistant, he asked what happened.
The assistant replied: "Well...everything was fine until some vendor walked by and yelled, 'PEANUTS!'.” |
