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Pastimes : Jokes and Humor Only
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From: Tomato5/13/2025 8:49:45 PM
   of 6597
 
When someone says, "chicken pot pie"

I get excited three times.

—

My friend writes songs about sewing machines.


She’s a Singer songwriter.

—

Instead of a swear jar, I have a negativity jar. Every time I have pessimistic thoughts, I put a dollar in.


It’s currently half empty.

—

As a child my priest traumatized me.


He cheated on me with another altar boy.

-

My paralyzed girlfriend asked me to perform cunnilingus on her.


I told her I don’t eat vegetables.
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