I dated a female dentist once.
She had the whitest teeth I ever came across.
—
Necrophilia: the last nail in the coffin.
—
The best thing about necrophilia:
You don't have to settle for for just any girl with a pulse.
—
"I'm into homosexual necrophilia," Tom said,
in dead earnest.
—
A message in German sent 110 years ago by homing pigeon was just found.
Unfortunately, it was an acceptance letter to art school.
—
The first Jewish President of the United States is elected
The night before the inauguration he calls his mother.
"Mom, I'd love for you to come visit for the inauguration and stay with me for a few days.”
"Oh I don't know, airfare is so expensive these days.”
"Mom, I'll fly you out on Air Force One!”
"Oh, but you know, cab fare is ridiculous.”
"Mom, the Presidential motorcade will drive you here.”
"But accommodations, especially during the inau—"
"MOM!! I'll put you in the Lincoln bedroom itself!!”
She reluctantly agrees, hangs up and starts talking to her friend.
"Who was that?”
"My son.”
gasp "The doctor??”
"No, the other one.”
--
There was a brawl in our local Chinese restaurant last night.
It was a scene of wonton destruction. |
