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Pastimes : Jokes and Humor Only

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From: Tomato

8/10/2025 7:13:00 PM

of 6591

Why did the 1920's gangster get scurvy?

He didn't take his vitamin, see.

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A woman on a dating site sent me a message saying, "Wow! Your gorgeous, how come your still single?"

"It's spelled 'you're'," I replied.

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Yo momma so fat,

she got triabetes.

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I think my wife wants me to try autoerotic asphyxiation.

Every time I talk to her about sex, she leaves me hanging.

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The inventor of the anagram died recently.

May he erect a penis.

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My local drug dealer started dressing up as a Jehovah's Witness so he wouldn't arouse suspicion.
He got arrested after the police saw people actually letting him in.

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It's odd that Thelma & Louise spend an entire film challenging sexist stereotypes,

then die at the end because of their terrible driving.

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Due to the sad state of my sex life, I have decided to convert to Islam.

My new name is Seldom Bin Laid.

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My four year old daughter has been learning Spanish now for over a year but she still can’t seem to say “please.”

I think that’s poor for four.

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