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Pastimes : Jokes and Humor Only

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From: Tomato	9/7/2025 7:14:18 PM
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What do you call the sexuality where you're attracted to men and women but neither are attracted to you? Bi-yourself. — Apparently most people in The Vatican make their purchases online Makes sense. I mean, they are a PayPal state. — A man and his wife are sitting down to dinner. “Ringling Brothers is coming to town this week,” she said. “The poster says they have a dancing bear. I always wanted to see one of those.” “Maybe next year,” says the man. “Work’s really busy this week.” The next night at dinner, the man can barely sit down before his wife starts talking excitedly. “The neighbors went to the show today and said the tightrope walkers were doing the Hokey Pokey right up there on the wire! Can you even imagine?” “I’d love to take you,” said the man. “But the boss’ll be mad if I don’t get this project finished.” The following night the wife gushed about how the paperboy told her about how a dozen clowns had popped out of this tiny car and did the can-can in bloomers and it was about the funniest thing he ever saw. The man was starting to feel a little bad that he couldn’t take her, but work was work. The night after, the wife was downcast. “My book club said last night the lion tamer and the girl who rides the elephants did a waltz and it was just perfectly romantic,” she said. “It feels like we’re the only people in town who haven’t seen the show yet and they only have one more tomorrow! Oh please can’t we go?” The man thinks it over and decides that this might be the only opportunity for them to see such a thing, and maybe work can wait. He calls his friend to ask him to cover for him at work the next day, and the man and his wife go to bed excited about seeing the show. The next day at work the boss notices the man is out and inquires about it with the friend. “Oh,” says the friend. “He can’t come in today due to four unseen circus dances.”

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