| | | Stephen Miller’s cousin recently wrote this about him. The post went viral, and we’re reposting it here for those that didn’t read her.
A preface: I have debated about sharing this. A week ago, after the ICE raids in Camarillo, I had the worst panic attack I’ve experienced in over 30 years. (Shoutout to Zoloft for holding it together. F off, RFK, Jr.) Hours of sobbing, shaking, nausea, and complete loss of control into the early morning hours, led me to do the only thing that ever brings some clarity: write. The next day I started to write, while still reeling from the emotional hangover. A few days later, I was struck with another panic attack, this time as I was driving (thankfully close enough to home to make it back in one piece.) This sent me back into a spiral of heartbreak. I picked up where I had left off, and kept writing.
Many of you know who my cousin is. Being public about it is something I’ve struggled with. I live with real fear about what posting something this raw might bring. I am living with the deep pain of watching someone I once loved become the face of evil. But I know that staying silent only deepens the ache. There’s so much more I could say, and maybe someday I will. It’s a long read. I’m wordy AF.
-----
Last night, I found myself in a stage of grief I didn’t even realize I had been carrying. A grief that’s been living inside me for years—quiet, but constant. It comes from being so close to the root of something violent and vile in this country. I cried until I couldn’t breathe, hours of sobbing, gasping, shaking, sic.....
alte.substack.com |
|
