Why is morning difficult in Athens ?
Because dawn is tough on Greece.
—
After Adam stayed out late a few nights, Eve became suspicious.
“You’re running around with another woman—admit it!” she demanded.
“What other woman?” Adam shot back. “You’re the only one here.”
That night, Adam was fast asleep when he was awoken by Eve poking him in the chest.
“What are you doing?”
“Counting your ribs.”
—
So it's the first day of college and the Dean of Women is finishing up her speech to the female freshman.
"In conclusion, ladies, if you get pregnant, you'll likely have to drop out and miss out on many of your dreams. Think about it: is that one hour of pleasure worth a lifetime of commitment?"
"Now," the Dean says, "Are there any questions?"
"Yeah," says a voice from the back. "How do you make them last an hour?”
—
What’s the difference between an informal dinner event and a pirate having sex?
One you come as you are, the other you arrrr as you come.
—
A small plane crashed in the middle of the desert. The pilot and co-pilot wandered around for days in search of food, but could find nothing. Finally the co-pilot announced: ‘I’m so hungry....
I’m going to chop off my dick and eat it.’
‘Before you do,’ said the pilot. ‘Think of your girlfriend.’
‘What’s the point? At this rate I will never see her again anyway.’
‘I know, but if you think of her first, hopefully there will be enough for both of us. |