Jeff "Shecky" O,
Off Topic. Waaaayy off. concerning Jeff O's acute case of mental diabetes from this afternoon.(#971)
Nice comeback! Especially that part about if I'm looking for somthing to pick on, to try picking my nose! You are such a Caution! HAHAHAHA! Don't get me started! At least it was better than "Oh Huh!" Or "Says You!" When did you first hear that one? Do you remember who was President at the time? You have the intellect of a sack of hammers!
You succeeded in posting an even more painful (for the rest of us) post to exhibit your lack of humor. God! Did you really think that three page post you unleashed on us was...funny? Jeff, LISTEN TO ME...please try and understand...no...put down the slide rule...you are NOT FUNNY Okay? If you don't believe me, take what you wrote to school tommorrow and ask your teacher. After reading it, she will slap you. Very hard. Over and over.
You violate the prime tenet of a comedy: If it is not funny, don't keep repeating it (for three pages!).
A well developed sense of humor is a sign of high intellect, do you see the fundimental problem you face?
You need to realize that you are waaayyy out of your element (which, I suspect, is formaldehyde). !
As if its not bad enough that I'm in HNLY at .48, but now I have to read the humor of someone who wets his pants over the "WORDLESS WORKSHOP" in Popular Mechanics. Do everyone a big favor and try waiting until you can beat Algernon through the maze before you take on a career in comedy, Okay Charly?
Mabe with a few years of intense training, you could write professionally--I was just saying the other day that we could use a good user's manual for the toaster oven. Mabe you could work for the "Tonight Show"--have you ever waxed a lobby that big?
Your post reminds me of those horrible annonymous faxes that were going around in the 80's where comic genius's in the copier room tryed to share their gift with the world. Some hysterical stuff. They would replace the words from poems like "the night before Christmas" with sexual references and dirty words. But you...you go one better. You pull language from a software manual...and change a few words about bowling, and your wife, and then share this thesis lenth monument to your lack of creativity with people who are trying to get info about their HNLY stock.
Why can't you put this PAP where it won't be so annoying--like inserted in our Gas Bill, along with those other offers that noone looks at.
Jeff, there is a big difference between being able to recognize humor, and actually being funny enough to create it. Mabe you heard a joke once and thought to yourself: "That funny--I want make joke too!" ...Or somthing to that effect. Please, I beg you, not just for me, but for the hundreds of people on our thread who, unlike you, have brainwave activity that can still raise a ripple on an EEG monitor, STOP THIS TORTURE. Don't you realize that so painfully lame was your last post that everyone who got trapped into reading it was praying for a quick and merciful death? Thanks a pantload.
Save your forays into comedy for your Family reunion Talent shows (where you can still get beat out by a five-year-old nephew who can belch the ABC's, and the comedy stylings of Dan Quayle).
Allright, I apologize. That "Quayle" comment was way out of line. Your actually funnier that that.
So Jeff in a nutshell:
* Keep your HNLY
* Give up on your pathetic attempts at humor, and don't quit your day job at the License Tag Office.
*Just because your not funny, doesn't nessessarily mean that you're stupid, but it sure seems like a safe bet.
And Harper Lee, shame on you for encouraging him, and pour me a glass of whatever you were drinking today. It obviously helped dull the pain.
Back to HNLY (I hope).
Matt ,
on one foot, handcuffed, holding the muskmelon, Two cans of Readi-Whip, Forty feet of kite string, and a 9V battery...and thinking of Jane.
PS. Jeff...buddy..You know I'm just kidding right? I mean nothing personal by all this. Its all in good fun.
...Moron. (you see what I did there? See?)
End of lesson. |
