Stitch
A little lite reading.
For expats who sometimes wonder if they've been in Asia too
long, Reader D.G. spotted this handy Asian Immersion Test.
Ready to take the plunge?
PERSONAL HABITS
1. Have you discovered that the footprints on the toilet seat are
your own?
2. Do you no longer wait in line, but automatically go to the front
of any queue
3. If you are male, do you find yourself holding hands and/or
hugging male colleagues on a regular basis?
4. Do you find that the bottom of escalators is a good place to
stop and plan the rest of your day?
5. Do you automatically punch all floors when you enter an
elevator?
6. Do you find it stimulating to force your way into an elevator
before anyone has had a chance to get out?
7. Do you find yourself paying to use a toilet that you wouldn't
go within a kilometre of at home?
WORK
1. Do you no longer wonder how someone making 15,000 baht
a month can drive a Mercedes?
2. Are you no longer surprised when no decisions are made at
meetings, other than to fix a date and venue for the next meeting?
3. Do you rank the decision-making ability of your staff by how
long it takes them to reply, "Up to you"?
4. Do you now accept that you have to queue to get your
number that lets you join the next queue?
TRANSPORT
1. Have you thought about buying a motorcycle as a family car?
2. Have you accepted without question your mechanic's
assertion that your car is "broken" and it will cost you a lot of
money to get it "fixed"?
3. Are you no longer surprised when you are passed while
passing another vehicle?
4. On airplanes, do you now find it saves time to stand and
retrieve your luggage during the plane's final approach?
5. Do you love the challenge of avoiding three-metre-deep holes
in roads and footpaths?
ENTERTAINMENT
1. Are you quite happy to repeat your order six times in a
restaurant that has only four items on the menu?2
2. Do you find it amusing to have your waiter repeat your order
exactly and then have the cook prepare an entirely different dish?
3. Do you now believe everything you read in your local
newspaper?
If you answered 'yes' to some of these questions, you are well on
your way to being immersed; more than half and you are
submerged; all, you have already drowned.
Life is tough
Today's parenting award goes to Madison West, who is teaching
her son the most important of all American values.
The boy had enrolled in an elective physics course at his high
school in Guilford County, North Carolina, but he found it
tougher than he thought it would be. He wanted to drop the
course but the school wouldn't let him.
Mother had just the solution. And no, it didn't involve suggesting
that her boy work harder.
She's suing the school for $10 million, saying that a failing grade
will hurt his chances of getting into college.
Should he get that far, perhaps he will express his gratitude to his
mother by studying law.
Professorial advice
Then there was the one about the student who walked into her
professor's office, arranged herself provocatively on his sofa and
purred: "I would do anything to pass your course."
"Anything?" the professor asked, a glint in his eye.
"Anything you desire," she said.
The professor loosened his tie and gazed into his student's eyes.
"Would you . . ." he stammered . . .
"Would you . . . study?"
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