PFE (Pfizer) How high will it go? Message Board

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Biotech / Medical : PFE (Pfizer) How high will it go?

PFE 25.05

-0.1%

Dec 18 3:59 PM EST

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To: Jerry Olson who wrote (2890)	5/27/1998 10:21:00 AM
From: John Sikora	Read Replies (1) of 9523

Jerry, Don't know if this has made the rounds yet, but it's pretty damn funny!! > >> >With Viagra such a hit, Pfizer is bringing forth a whole line of > >drugs oriented towards improving the performance of men in today's > >society... > >> >DIRECTRA - a dose of this drug given to men before leaving oncar > >> >trips caused 72 percent of them to stop and ask directions when > >> >they got lost, compared to a control group of 0.2 percent. > >> > > >> >PROJECTRA - Men given this experimental new drug were far more > >> >likely to actually finish a household repair project before > >> >starting a new one. > >> > > >> >CHILDAGRA - Men taking this drug reported a sudden, overwhelming > >> >urge to perform more child-care tasks - especially cleaning up > >> >spills and "little" accidents. > >> > > >> >COMPLIMENTRA - In clinical trials, 82 percent of middle-aged men > >> >administered this drug noticed that their wives had a new hairstyle.Currently being tested to see if its effects extend to noticing >new clothing. > >> > > >> >BUYAGRA - Married and otherwise attached men reported a sudden > >> >urge to buy their sweeties expensive jewelry and gifts after taking this drug for only two days. Still to be seen: whether the drug can be continued for a period longer than your favorite store's return limit. > >> >NEGA-VIAGRA - Has the exact opposite effect of Viagra. Currently > >> >undergoing clinical trials on sitting U.S. presidents. > >> > > >> >NEGA-SPORTAGRA - This drug had the strange effect of making men > >> >want to turn off televised sports and actually converse with other family members. > >> >FLATULAGRA - This complex drug converts men's noxious intestinal > >> >gases back into food solids. Special bonus: Dosage can be doubled for long car rides. > >> > > >> >FLYAGRA - This drug has been showing great promise in treating men with O.F.D. (Open Fly Disorder). Especially useful for men on Viagra. > >> >PRYAGRA - About to fail its clinical trial, this drug gave men > >> >in the test group an irresistible urge to dig into the personal > >> >affairs of other people. Note: Apparent overdose turned three test subjects into "special prosecutors." > >> > > >> >LIAGRA - This drug causes men to be less than truthful when being asked about their sexual affairs. Will be available in Regular, Grand Jury and Presidential Strength versions. > > > > >

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