Story 5499 NotNeiderhoffer Unretires
NEW YORK (Dow Jones Markets)- In a hastily arranged press conference held near the falafel cart on the northwest corner of Park and 48th, NotNeiderhoffer announced that he will resume his friday recaps on Actrading.
In a sometimes emotional speech, the punky kid, armed only with a degree from Youth Services, International (OTC:YSII) recounted his struggle to the top of the heap in journalistic mediocrity and why he returned to the Friday tradition. "I must apologize for my rash decision to retire to a life of leisure. Between the recent market volatility, the pressures of the CFA exam and the fruitless juggling of two girlfriends that I attempted to keep mutually exclusive, I suffered what can only be termed a breakdown. I thought retiring was the only way out, but after seeing those Alliance Capital ads on CNBC where the old people who thought they were set for retirement have to go back to work mowing lawns and such, I realized that I must keep brown bagging it."
Dispelling market rumors that he was about to jump ship to thestreet.com to pen a weekly piece on the burgeoning factoring industry, he replied "The rumors about joining Cramer were entirely unfounded. Besides, I would never play second fiddle to Herb Greenberg. That jerk penned a hatchet job on my beloved Black Box (OTC:BBOX) several weeks ago and I can only believe that David Rocker has a direct line to his office. Those shorts are very crafty."
When asked what played the biggest role in his return, the perpetual CFA candidate said only "I could not bear to see Zman take over my duties. I may occasionally post early enough on friday to catch the 4:02 friday Cannonball from Hunters Point where I will take up my usual spot in the bar car."
(END) DOW JONES MARKETS 5-28-98
10:55 PM
Additional codes (N/FNC, N/MNT, M/CGL, M/FIN)
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