........Then I typed some more, and this is what came out:
The One Eyed Pirate
A pirate walks into a tavern. He has a wooden leg, a hook instead of a hand and a patch over his right eye. He sits down at the bar and orders a beer.
The curious young man sitting next to him asks the pirate how he came to have a wooden leg. The pirate replies, "Well, I was standing on the deck of me ship one day and a wave washed me overboard. Then a shark came along and bit me leg off."
The young man then asked, "How did you lose your hand?" "Many years ago, I was fighting the British, and one of the bastards cut me hand off," answered the pirate. "They couldn't find a hand, so they put this hook on me."
Next, the young man asked, "How did you lose your eye?" "I was standing on the deck of me boat," says the pirate, "and a bird flew over and shit in my eye." The young man, now completely confused, says, "That's it? A bird shit in your eye and you lost it?" The pirate replies,
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"Well, it was me first day with the hook."
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