>
>> A Woman's Random Thoughts
>>
>> Skinny people piss me off! Especially when they say things like, "You
>> know sometimes I forget to eat."
>> Now I've forgotten my address, my mother's maiden name, and my keys.
>> But I've never forgotten to eat. You have to be a special kind of
>> stupid to forget to eat.
>>
>> A friend of mine confused her valium with her birth control pills. She
>> had 14 kids, but she doesn't give a shit.
>>
>> They keep telling us to get in touch with our bodies. Mine isn't all
>> that communicative but I heard from
>> it the other day after I said, "Body, how'd you like to go to the nine
>> o'clock class in vigorous toning?" Clear as a bell my body said,
>> "listen bitch... do it and you die."
>>
>> The trouble with some women is that they get all excited about
>> Nothing (and then they marry him).
>>
>> Gay, straight... they all want blow jobs.
>>
>> I read this article that said the typical symptoms of stress are
>> eating too much, smoking too much, impulse buying and driving too
>> fast. Are they kidding? That is my idea of a perfect day.
>>
>> I know what Victoria's Secret is. The secret is that nobody older
>> than 30 can fit into their shit.
>>
>> "If men can run the world, why can't they stop wearing neckties? How
>> intelligent is it to start the day by
>> tying a noose around your neck?"
>>
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