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Gold/Mining/Energy : Strictly: Drilling and oil-field services
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To: upanddown who wrote (23793)6/10/1998 10:47:00 PM
From: mph  Read Replies (1) of 95453
 
Just thought I'd perform a public service by cataloging ten suggestions for improving the condition of our portfolios and psyches in these difficult times. Some of these ideas have been strewn about randomly during our many dark days and will probably seem familiar. Feel free to add to the list in the spirit of easing communal anguish.

Here goes:

1. Assist the storage problem by offering up Big Dog's pool and any other receptacles available through our collective efforts. (Those milk cartons you toss out so freely could come in handy!)

2. Make burnt offerings, sacrifice vestal virgins, or even light candles in church(who knows, something might work):

3.Release helium balloons imprinted with names of favorite stocks(there's good karma out there somewhere. Maybe that's the way to find it);

4. Bitch and moan(probably could be listed several times):

5. Drink lots of brown ale;

6.Ban brown ale and make Schlitz the official driller brew (this one's for you slimdoc):

7.Immediately sell whichever stocks certain of our posters (U know who U Are) announce they are buying since this insures an immediate decline in price:

8.Take Viagra regularly (may not help the price of oil but sure could put a smile on your face);

9. Invest in all companies that market St. Johns Wort and do massive field research and due dilligence on the efficacy of the treatment.

10. Forget about doing any DD, spending time studying the market or trying to make reasoned investment decisions. Instead, next time you get itchy trigger fingers, let your favorite monkey toss a dart at the dartboard for you so that stock selection becomes a painless (and guiltfree) exercise.

If I have left out anyone's ideas, my apologies.

mph<VBG>
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