Yo DSD! Your opinin do matter to me, boy!
Two stories from my day:
Friday morning I looked out at the front lawn and noticed two of the sprinkler heads were stuck which explains why there are some lovely stripes of healthy green grass surrounded by dead yellow straw. Dan tried to make up something about drainage and inclines when I told him. Then he said it was artistic and we could call it Zebra grass and pretend we meant to do it. He just didn't want to go out in the heat and fix them. Not that the 110 degrees kept him from pitching a ballgame yesterday. Isn't that funny?
Anyway, this morning I looked out and those same two sprinklers were still stuck so I ran out and started digging at one of them. The St Augustine grass had wrapped itself around the thingiemabob and was holding it captive. I impressed myself greatly when my attempts
worked and it started to turn again. I gracefully jumped over it as it passed by and ran to the other one. I dug up the second one in installments, grabbing a handful of grass and then running out of range when the other spray came around, returning after it passed and
grabbing some more grass. (Why, you are wondering , didn't I just go in the house and turn off the system? That would have been too easy. And then how would I know if it were fixed or not?) Success! THe second one began turning! Only now there was no where to run. I started screaming and jumping around with Blue, thinking it was a game, leaping up and clawing at my nightgown. I finally gave up and just walked through the streams, nightgown and hair dripping. And heard my neighbor say, "Great show!" He was standing in his driveway with his dogs, watching the whole thing. I gathered as much damp dignity as I could muster, haughtily said, "I'm so glad you enjoyed it," and started back to the house, and the damn cycle shut off, the next one clicked on, and one of the sprinklers shot me square in the face.
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STORY #2
I did this really nice thoughtful thing today. When I got home from the grocery store, there was a message on the machine for Lauren. It said, "THis is Macarena Inc. We're just following up on the work we did for you to make sure all was satisfactory. Call us at 329-****.
So I called and said,"I wanted to tell you that you left a message on my machine accidentally."
SHe said,"Who is this?"
I said, "Well, that doesn't really matter, because you didn't really want to talk to me in the first place."
"Well, who was the message for?"
I think you said it was for Lauren. Someone you did work for?"
"Lauren who?"
"Well, um. I don't know. You wanted to know if she was happy with your work, and you haven't done any work for us, although I feel sure if you had, I'd be very happy with it." I added this last because I am Southern.
"Well, I just made a whole lot of those calls to people."
"This number is 329-****," I said helpfully.
There was a pause. "Oh, yeah. Here it is. I remember that one. You didn't have anything on that machine to tell people if they have the right number or not!" Her tone was very accusatory. I immediately felt guilty.
AND I APOLOGIZED!!!!! Can you believe that??? I felt guilty and apologized to some stupid woman who can't even dial a phone number correctly!!!! And I had the courtesy to call her and tell her that she'd messed up!! And there she was making me feel bad because I didn't have a message on my machine telling her how stupid she was ("Hey, stupid! This isn't Lauren! You dialed
the wrong number!!!")
Do you think this is another one of those Catholic guilt things?
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