After eight months of intrigue -- alleged lawsuits, private investigators, ill-defined deals with unnamed parties and investment firms and, alas, the rat-a-tat-tat of Leroy T and his magical mystery machine, time appears to have run out for MISM.
"Shit or get off the pot," a chorus of shareholders screamed. But what did the company do? Did it shit? No! Did it get off the pot? No! It just sat there in the dawn of porcelain reality, contemplating the divine circumference of its own rectum.
"Oh, what a beautiful shape," it gushed. Indeed, it was an asshole Greek gods would envy. Meanwhile, the tide ebbed and flowed five-hundred times or more.
Alleged quotes from the Chairman:
When we disclose our operational plans for the company you will learn how we will finance further acquisitions 23 November 19997
A great deal has been made (incorrectly) that we are a company with no money, and why should a major company sell us a 20 million dollars per year business. Well, they have agreed to sell to us. I quite frankly do not understand the issue with having to know all the details 26 November 1997
Boy, that's a teller isn't it?
1997 has been a breakout year for MIS 1 December 1997
See, we could've seen this coming!
Last fall I promised regular updates to keep all of you informed on events at MIS. 27 January 19998
In the end, the rectum yielded enlightenment, and shareholders -- at long last -- smelled the odor of truth. |
