Something cute sent to me by a Mercedez Dealer:
Merging Preference
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Directors at Daimler-Benz and Chrysler have announced an
agreement to adopt English as the preferred language for
communications, rather than German, which was the other
possibility. As part of the negotiations, Directors at Chrysler
conceeded that English spelling has some room for improvements
and has accepted a 5 year phase in plan. In the first year, "S" will
be used instead of the soft "C". also the hard"C" will be replaced
with "K". Not only will this klear up konfusion, but komputers kan
have one less letter. There will be a growing kompany enthusiasm
in the sekond year when the troublesome "PH" will be replaced
by "F". This will make words like "fotograf" 20% shorter. In the
third year, Daimler-Khrysler will enkourage the removal of
double letters, which have always been a determent to akkurate
spelling. Also, all will agree that the horrible mess of silent "e's"
in the language is disgraseful, and they would go. By the fourth
year, people will be reseptive to steps such a replasing "TH" with
"Z" and "W" by "V". During ze fifz year, ze unesessary "o" kan be
dropped from vords kontaining "ou", and similar changes vuld of
kors be applied to all ozer kombinations of letters. After zis fiftz
year, ve vill hav a really sensible vriten style. Zere vill be no
more trubls or diffikultis and employee's vill find it easy to
komunikat viz each ozer. Ov kourse all suppliers vill be expekted
to svitsh to zis for all business kommunikation via
Daimler-Khrysler.
ZE DREAM VILL FINALLY KOME TRUE. |
