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Pastimes : Laughter is the Best Medicine - Tell us a joke

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To: RinConRon who wrote (6497)	8/15/1998 10:39:00 PM
From: george wood	Read Replies (1) of 62549

Why did Bill Clinton cross the road? To meet the chick. Why does Hillary wear the pants in the White House? Cause Bill can't keep his on. Most people are concerned about AIDS when having sex...... ....Bill is worried about whether the aides will have sex. Why does clinton wish he was like Ted Kennedy? Cause Kennedy has an ex-wife and a dead girlfriend. Who is the only woman in the White House not having sex with Bill? Hillary. Why doesn't Monica eat bananas? She can't find the zipper. Why does Monica always drink with a straw? Practice. What is the recipe for clinton stew? A small weenie in hot water. Ingredients for new, improved Clinton stew: One small weenie, one tongue, one cooked goose, lots of spilled beans and hot water. Why did Bill get into this predicament? He didn't know that harass was one word. What's clinton's new presidential anthem? Kneel to the Chief. How does Bill rationalize that oral sex is not a sexual relationship? Because Monica didn't swallow. Why cant they convict Monica? She swallowed all the evidence. What is the name of Hillary Clinton's new White House intern? Lorena Bobbit A reporter asked Clinton one day. " Was Monica lying?" Clinton responded by saying. " No she was on her knees." Did you hear that Paula Jones was able to positively identify the distinguishing markings on Bill Clinton's genitals? She correctly identified them as Gennifer Flowers's lipstick! Headline in yesterday's paper - " Bush Finally Defeats Clinton ! " How are bill and Monica alike? They both claim not to have inhaled. What is the Secret Service nickname for Bill's penis? The Titanic...cause so many went down on it. What did clinton say to Gore about the whole affair? Pardon me. What was clinton's last gift to Monica? Spot remover. Now it's ROGER Clinton who keeps asking, "What's my dumb brother gotten into?" How does Bill keep Monica Lewinsky away from the White House? He keeps offering to send Ted Kennedy to give her a ride. What does Teddy Kennedy have that Bill Clinton wishes he did? A dead girlfriend. What does James Bond Have that Bill Clinton wishes he did? A LOT of dead Girlfriends! Did you hear that Clinton has announced there is a new national bird? The spread eagle. Advance script from the State of the Union Address: "FOUR SCORES AND ..." Why does Hillary want to have sex with Bill every day at 5 am? She wants to make sure that she is the first lady. Bill Clinton said on the news lat night that he was ready to take Saddam Hussein out. Saddam replied saying that it was okay as long as he didn't have to sleep with him. What position does Hilary play on clinton's sex team? Left out... What did Monica say when the FBI ask for the "Dress?" Come and get it. Why does clinton swim naked in the white house pool? He is trolling for interns. What does Nixon have in common with clinton? Tricky Dick Why do they call him slick willy? K-Y Jelly Clinton has established a new defense fund called S.U.C.K. Send US Cash Kwik

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