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Politics : Clinton's Scandals: Is this corruption the worst ever?
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To: dougjn who wrote (7021)9/26/1998 10:41:00 AM
From: Les H  Read Replies (1) of 13994
 
Court Decision Opens the Door For Mandatory Oral-Sex in the Workplace

Allentown, PA - Today, judge Norman Parker, ruled that John Boyd was not guilty of sexually harassing his 27 year old secretary, Belinda Johnson, despite the fact that Boyd openly admitted that he told Miss Johnson that if she didn't perform oral-sex on him that she would lose her job.

Judge Parker agreed with Boyd's attorney who argued that because President Clinton's definition of "sexual relations" excludes oral-sex, it is not sexual harassment to demand oral-sex from an employee. Said Boyd's attorney, "Oral-sex is not sex. The man who holds the highest office in our country has made that perfectly clear. Therefore, my client cannot possibly be guilty of "sexually" harassing Miss Johnson. If he had demanded that she have intercourse with him, then things would be different."

Judge Parker's decision is precedent setting and is expected to have far reaching implications for businesses across the country. Some corporations are already making moves to include oral-sex as part of their secretarial job requirements. Said one executive, "I have already changed the form that I use during my annual employee review. The form now includes a line called 'BJ Performance'."

Surprisingly the National Organization for Women (NOW) supports Judge Parker's decision. Olga Lesbomb, spokeswoman for NOW told BNN, "Judge Parker's decision was based on our President's definition of sex. If Clinton says that oral-sex isn't sex then we're not going to argue. Although, there will be some women who won't like this we encourage them to just suck it up and look on the bright side. At least we have a President who has fought to keep women from going back to the dark ages when abortion wasn't legal."
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