Thanks. And some good links.
I thought that Letterman joke was pretty funny.
I think the truth is that a lot of middle aged men can imagine themselves being mighty tempted if a sufficiently attractive (to them) 20 something, who acted like no child, determinedly flirted with them for months, knowing full well the man was married and planning on staying that way, etc., and wanted to have a limited, secret affair, the classic occasional brief furtive moments. I'm not saying we'd all succumb to the temptation, I'm saying it's a temptation we can imagine.
But would much rather not admit to.
(In fact I think that pretty strong temptation is pretty much build into our male genes. And that the more successful and powerful we are, perhaps, the greater the temptation.)
I think that most women instinctively know that that sort of temptation is pretty hard for a lot of men to fully resist. If it really comes that easy, and that much on the man's terms. There are reasons why the "tramp" is so despised and belittled by other women.
I also think that that scenario of the really determined pursuit by the really attractive young thing, who wants so limited a nearly only sexual affair on so completely the married man's terms -- is not an everyday occurrence for most men. Even most successful men. Other sorts of full fledged messy involvements that are more likely are a lot easier for most of us to resist.
The sorts of people who regularly do get offered the first sorts of propositions by skads of different females to choose between -- rock stars, movie stars, some politicians .... well, they're pretty famous for playing around, aren't they? (Rock and movie stars are especially famous for it, perhaps because the think, rightly, that in their case it often enhances their appeal. They're supposed to be bad boys.)
Now maybe the sorts of people who go into those areas have vastly higher incidences of low moral character. Or maybe, if we are to be honest, it has something to do with the amount, and type, of opportunity.
Doug |
