Jeff,
I've been working on a personal application for FBNA to OEM for me. I've dubbed the prototype with the catchy name of StockMarket2000, which will fit in nicely with the other software in the FBNA 2000 series.
Here's a brief summary of it's purpose and capabilities. Within it's 14 gigabyte compressed database, I've stored all of the stock prices ever from the NYSE, NASDAQ and the ASE. There's also a 2 gigabyte compressed database of all Canadian stocks going back to 1975. The user of StockMarket2000 can back test any market investment strategy going all the way back to day one of market activity in the good ole' US of A.
But if you think I stopped there, you're wrong. Using artificial intelligence programming, precognitive programming methodologies and solar time warps contained within the recent magnetic solar storm, I was able to program StockMarket2000 to see into the future and load the closing stock prices on all American and Canadian stocks well into the next century (I stopped at year 2049 because I was running out of disk space.).
Knowing that there would be skeptics within the press, I was further able to load a fourth database with all pertinent press releases regarding North American stocks that will appear on the pages of the WSJ over the next 51 years. Fantastic, no?
But it gets better. I loaded some of my own favorite investing strategies and, using the previously loaded old data, I was able to successfully prove all strategies against all old prices, and am including these strategies free of any additional charges within the now completed application. As these strategies are 100% guaranteed, purchasers of StockMarket2000 can use my strategies, or develop their own, back test against the old prices and then use the future prices to see if their strategies will really work. Or they can just cheat and look up the answers, and invest that way if they want. Not as much fun, but...
To prove to you that StockMarket2000 works, I searched the future pages of the WSJ and came up with this little gem:
04/01/1999 08:09AM FBN Associates Amazing StockMarket2000
NAZDAQ: FBNA
FBN Associates To OEM StockMarket2000 Effective Today
SEDONA, AZ--(BIDNESSWIRE)--April 1, 1999--FBN Associates (Software), (NAZDAQ:FBNA) developer of year 2000 compliance software today announced that it has secured exclusive rights to OEM the amazing StockMarket2000 software application. Investors who purchase this software from FBN Associates will finally have the ability to never again make a losing investment. Prices will start at $24,995 for the scaled-down future prices database up to $199,295 per copy for the entire product and five databases. The full version of StockMarket2000 is also now available for purchase on line.
BidnessWire reporters tested the first available copies this morning and found no discernable bugs or errors in the software. Amazingly, the software has proven to be 100% correct in predicting past stock prices, and with numbers this high, we see no reason to doubt the future closing prices.
FBN CEO TEDennis was quoted as saying, "We see this tool as being the most advanced of it's kind for the foreseeable future. Finally, the small investor will be on an equal footing with the Wall Street wizards. We intend to market only to the little guy! Just this morning, I looked up tomorrow's closing price for FBNA, and guess what??? We will quadruple in value overnight!!! What great news for our shareholders, eh?".
Bidness Wire reporters did note however, the conspicuous absence of certain controversial OTC-BB stocks from the future closing prices reports. When asked about the anomaly, CEO TEDennis replied, "We can only show the closing prices. We can show the news releases. If a certain stock no longer trades or was de-listed...".
So, when do you want to ink the deal???
KJC |
